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 Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.

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FleurDeLis
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PostSubject: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sun Oct 09, 2011 5:27 pm

Sorry, I couldn't think of a fitting title and that's probably due do the fact that I'm not sure how to describe the issue itself. I read an article about that a few years back but I can't remember all that much. At the time I kinda thought it was nonsense but as time goes by I find it more and more fitting.

For me, sex with a partner is less about getting off and more about sharing a super duper intimate connection; I really couldn't care less whether or not I have an orgasm in terms of rating sex as good or bad. My partner, on the other hand, is quite concerned with the orgasm itself ...

Anyhow, I often feel drained after sex and I'm not talking about feeling physically exhausted; rather, it is mentally or emotionally draining. Now, that article I read years ago suggested that males tend to "dump" their negative energies into the female during intercourse. Males rarely talk it out if something bothers them, they are looking for some way of release; sex does just that for them and it's pretty effective. The female then, sucks that up (lul...words ...) and holds onto that energy. Does that make sense?

I can see this being true but I'm not entirely sure; it could be an oversimplified dynamic or taken out of context ...

Any thoughts that could help explain this? Or possible solutions?
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Smiley
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sun Oct 09, 2011 11:55 pm

FleurDeLis wrote:
Sorry, I couldn't think of a fitting title and that's probably due do the fact that I'm not sure how to describe the issue itself. I read an article about that a few years back but I can't remember all that much. At the time I kinda thought it was nonsense but as time goes by I find it more and more fitting.

For me, sex with a partner is less about getting off and more about sharing a super duper intimate connection; I really couldn't care less whether or not I have an orgasm in terms of rating sex as good or bad. My partner, on the other hand, is quite concerned with the orgasm itself ...

Anyhow, I often feel drained after sex and I'm not talking about feeling physically exhausted; rather, it is mentally or emotionally draining. Now, that article I read years ago suggested that males tend to "dump" their negative energies into the female during intercourse. Males rarely talk it out if something bothers them, they are looking for some way of release; sex does just that for them and it's pretty effective. The female then, sucks that up (lul...words ...) and holds onto that energy. Does that make sense?

I can see this being true but I'm not entirely sure; it could be an oversimplified dynamic or taken out of context ...

Any thoughts that could help explain this? Or possible solutions?

Lol, absorbs would probably be a better usage of words.

Women are typically more emotional etc., so it makes sense. Personally, I'm more androgynous. I've noticed that when I have sex, it isn't really that I want the sex, but that I want the cuddling etc.. Sex is great and all, but it explains why I don't care much for sex in that the emotional craving supersedes the physical craving.

Solution? Maybe have sex when encountering mutual periods of emotional intimacy? Fuck if I know.

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FleurDeLis
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Mon Oct 10, 2011 8:37 pm

Agreed. absorbs would be a better choice of word lol ...

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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Thu Oct 13, 2011 2:19 am

FleurDeLis wrote:
Sorry, I couldn't think of a fitting title and that's probably due do the fact that I'm not sure how to describe the issue itself. I read an article about that a few years back but I can't remember all that much. At the time I kinda thought it was nonsense but as time goes by I find it more and more fitting.

For me, sex with a partner is less about getting off and more about sharing a super duper intimate connection; I really couldn't care less whether or not I have an orgasm in terms of rating sex as good or bad. My partner, on the other hand, is quite concerned with the orgasm itself ...

Anyhow, I often feel drained after sex and I'm not talking about feeling physically exhausted; rather, it is mentally or emotionally draining. Now, that article I read years ago suggested that males tend to "dump" their negative energies into the female during intercourse. Males rarely talk it out if something bothers them, they are looking for some way of release; sex does just that for them and it's pretty effective. The female then, sucks that up (lul...words ...) and holds onto that energy. Does that make sense?

I can see this being true but I'm not entirely sure; it could be an oversimplified dynamic or taken out of context ...

Any thoughts that could help explain this? Or possible solutions?


namaste

this is a delicate subject for some people, so I will try to be somewhat considerate of that fact
but I have many thoughts about this

in the past, when I was younger sex was very much a release thing
I cared about giving to my partner, but the orgasm aspect of it did seem to be the overbearing factor
not just mine
I was also in several situations that because of my giving nature I was used
not that I minded the contact, but it really hurt me and gave me a very negative view of the whole thing

as a result, for many years, I was very pensive about relations
and while I am apparently a good lover and capable of inducing much pleasure
it was very empty to me because I felt like I was just giving away energy
so while I had numerous liasons, and two marriages, and thankfully no diseases
it was never....good

I think that this is how it is, there are some of us that are energy givers and some that are energy takers
and this is more apparent in this contact, because it is a time when you are mingled with another being so closely that there cannot help but be energy exchanged

I read a book, written by Andy Warhol, called From A to B, the Philosophy of Andy Warhol
and he talks about this
the quote is something ike
"you can have great sex and great love
great sex with unlove
great love with no sex

the two are independent of one another
and for some people sex is a giving thing while others it is a getting thing
I am one for who sex is a giving thing, so I choose very rarely to have it" - Andy Warhol

wise words

I guess I would say, try different things with your partner
and see if they can approach it in a different manner so that it is not a thing that takes from you
or, if this does not change, then perhaps it is something that is a sign of incompatible energy.

May light shine on you and keep you bright Smile

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FleurDeLis
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Thu Oct 13, 2011 8:03 pm

t1mb3rl1n3 wrote:

namaste

this is a delicate subject for some people, so I will try to be somewhat considerate of that fact
but I have many thoughts about this

in the past, when I was younger sex was very much a release thing
I cared about giving to my partner, but the orgasm aspect of it did seem to be the overbearing factor
not just mine
I was also in several situations that because of my giving nature I was used
not that I minded the contact, but it really hurt me and gave me a very negative view of the whole thing

as a result, for many years, I was very pensive about relations
and while I am apparently a good lover and capable of inducing much pleasure
it was very empty to me because I felt like I was just giving away energy
so while I had numerous liasons, and two marriages, and thankfully no diseases
it was never....good

I think that this is how it is, there are some of us that are energy givers and some that are energy takers
and this is more apparent in this contact, because it is a time when you are mingled with another being so closely that there cannot help but be energy exchanged

I read a book, written by Andy Warhol, called From A to B, the Philosophy of Andy Warhol
and he talks about this
the quote is something ike
"you can have great sex and great love
great sex with unlove
great love with no sex

the two are independent of one another
and for some people sex is a giving thing while others it is a getting thing
I am one for who sex is a giving thing, so I choose very rarely to have it" - Andy Warhol

wise words

I guess I would say, try different things with your partner
and see if they can approach it in a different manner so that it is not a thing that takes from you
or, if this does not change, then perhaps it is something that is a sign of incompatible energy.

May light shine on you and keep you bright Smile

That makes a lot of sense timber, thank you. I feel inclined to read Warhol's book now.

I have a few more thoughts on this but I'm not quite ready to share yet ...
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t1mb3rl1n3
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Thu Oct 13, 2011 9:09 pm

FleurDeLis wrote:


That makes a lot of sense timber, thank you. I feel inclined to read Warhol's book now.

I have a few more thoughts on this but I'm not quite ready to share yet ...


namaste, you are quite welcome

I suggest you do read the book, very good all around actually
I was kind of innundated with Warhol in my art classes in HS and College, but he actually had some really interesting things to say
and he had a very interesting way of thinking

I also am very much appreciative of Jean Michelle Basquiat, though I think he was more angry and trying to get by than anything, poor guy

share what you wish as you are ready, no judgements from me leastways

be well Smile

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aislinn

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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sat Oct 29, 2011 12:58 pm

Hello Fleur - may I make a suggestion?

Use an 'energy pocket' during sex; that is, take the negative energy into yourself, but hold it inside of you, then use it; convert it into energy for yourself, positive energy if that is your need.

This works very well actually, and can actually lend you a lot of extra energy/power if you keep a piece of yourself mindful during intercourse. Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sat Oct 29, 2011 2:23 pm

aislinn wrote:
Hello Fleur - may I make a suggestion?

Use an 'energy pocket' during sex; that is, take the negative energy into yourself, but hold it inside of you, then use it; convert it into energy for yourself, positive energy if that is your need.

This works very well actually, and can actually lend you a lot of extra energy/power if you keep a piece of yourself mindful during intercourse. Smile

Interesting thought ... I'll have to try that out.
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sat Oct 29, 2011 3:03 pm

lol, if you've been reading about the energy braiding - you can actually take that negative energy, convert it and then braid it into your own energy. Surprisingly powerful stuff Smile
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sat Oct 29, 2011 5:56 pm

I need to learn how to convert that ... not that I'm incapable, but usually doesn't happen through conscious effort. As a teen and early adult I used to paint to convert energy. Since I became a parent time has become a scarce resource; painting is the last thing on my to-do-list Sad.

I need to give alternative forms of conversion some thought.
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PostSubject: Re: Sex: Dumping of Energy ... or something like that.   Sat Oct 29, 2011 8:44 pm

I do it through meditation (and trust me, I understand the whole busy parent bit), but it doesn't have to take a long time. I run it through my chakras, bringing it out through the crown chakra (all better) and let it re-invest itself in my own energy Smile
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