The Truth is: I'm Iron Man

I missed a deadline a while ago because a series of crazy events, but later I was thinking....how could I justify myself by telling the truth when the truth is hard to swallow? 
I told the truth anyway and most likely they did not believe me....not big deal...it was not that important, but what if my life/future depended on them to believe me? 
For sure, the truth is always easy to tell....it is effortless...it is already in your mind and you don't have to be creating scenarios in order to tell it, but is it believable? What are the consequences?
This is a complex issue, can you imagine a transparent government telling the truth all the time?

Sometimes a lie is more believable than the truth.
Why waste your time and energy trying to explain and justify yourself when you know that no one is going to believe you?
Yep, I'm Iron Man. 

btw...this was the OP, but I decided to do things backwards this time (SIMPLE, BELIEVABLE, BUT A LIE) 
(The truth is that I don't have the patience to explain what the truth is and why the OP got screwed ....and you may not even believe me anyway..lol.)

lol, your reason for missing the deadline was "a series of crazy events"

is that a lie? because the reason I usually, well almost just about always, miss a deadline, is because I procrastinated on what I should have been doing...

did you procrastinate?

so I missed my work shift (I'm a waiter at a restaurant) the Sunday on Memorial Day weekend. The coincidental thing was, a few days prior, I had switched shifts with someone to get that shift. I was scheduled for Sunday dinner, and I switched with a coworker to get Sunday Lunch instead. I emailed management to let them know we switched shifts, and since management is asshole, he returned an email to me (my General manager did) saying "please stick to the schedule unless it is a dire or medical emergency."

LoL, me being the smart-ass I am, read his response literally, and looked up the term "dire" which is just a synonym for "having serious consequences." LoL. Management has control and anger issues, and they kind of get mad if you don't get on your knees, suck their dick, and beg first. So, instead of being a cool manager and saying, "aite cool, you covered your own shift, no sweat off my back, he gave me that message above.

So, instead of responding, I just decided that my reason was "dire" knowing that it would piss my manager off that I didn't respond to that email and switched shifts anyways. 

Okay, so just to recap, instead of working Sunday dinner, I am now supposed to work Sunday Lunch. The reason I could not work Sunday dinner, was because I got double scheduled at my new restaurant, so both restaurants I got scheduled for sunday Dinner. I figured that I care about my new job better, let's call it restaurant #2, so that's why I decided to reschedule my shift at restaurant #1. So, so far so good, I am scheduled for Sunday Lunch at restaurant #1, and then working a double shift, going to restaurant #2 for dinner shift. Fuck the manager at restaurant #1 if he gets mad, because my reason is "dire," lol, because I got a new job, and if I start switching shifts while I'm training at job #2 then I might get fired, lol, and that's pretty dire to me. So my reason qualifies.

so far so good.

Except I get arrested on Saturday night after I leave work. LoL. I have had a couple warrants out for my arrest for driving on a suspended license. 

Long story short, my bail is like $20,000.

Lol, long story short, blah blah blah, not only did I not inform my manager at job #1 that I indeed was planning on switching shifts (after he sent that "stick to the schedule unless..." email), I also missed the shift that I was supposed to have switched for...

lol lol lol.

So anyways, got bailed out by my aunt at about 1:30pm on Sunday. I walked across the street to the library to use the computer, and first thing I did was send an email to manager at restaurant #1...

it went something like this, paraphrasing "sorry I missed my shift (that you didn't even authorize in the first place lol) but I was in jail" I'm kind of lol'ing because people always use the "got sick with food poisoning" excuse the day before their shift instead of informing management ahead of time (like I did) when they actually just wanna go party...

and my REAL excuse was that I was in jail and I would have used my free phone call to call work but I didn't remember anyone's number lol 

so lol. and guess what? that nigga didn't even believe me, next time he saw me he asked for proof HAHAHAHAH fucking ha because I beat him to the punch and already had my booking report in my backpack and whipped it out like a pornstar whips out his cock for Jenna Jameson and slapped it on the table and was like "hah there's meh mugshot" whaddup nigga!?

well anyways needless to say I don't give a shit about that job and I actually effectively quit that job last week by just failing to show up for my assigned shift without telling anyone lol 

well that was my story about telling the truth that nobody was gonna believe, should have just said food poisoning bc nobody asks for proof of your puke

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

lol, your reason for missing the deadline was "a series of crazy events"

is that a lie? because the reason I usually, well almost just about always, miss a deadline, is because I procrastinated on what I should have been doing...

did you procrastinate?

I do procastinate quite often, but rarely miss my deadlines....kinda cutting the correct wire of a bomb with 2 seconds remaining....it does makes life more interesting..lol.
I do get things done, but in that case, I was denpending of one person who was depending of another person to provide some documents and the final excuse was that the first person was "hiking the Appalatchian trails" and could not be reached. I don't even know what the real reason was....not big deal, it was not that important. I just got pissed because I missed the deadline without a believable excuse for it.

the lesson learned is: don't depend on people.

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

the lesson learned is: don't depend on people.

Unfortunately quite often we have no choice and people who knows that other people depend on them are the ones that suck the most.

Oliver wrote:

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

the lesson learned is: don't depend on people.

Unfortunately quite often we have no choice and people who knows that other people depend on them are the ones that suck the most.

p.s. you spelled "depending" wrong as "denpending" (in your first response) -- I'm no Freud so I'll leave that Freudian slip for you to decode.

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

Oliver wrote:

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

the lesson learned is: don't depend on people.

Unfortunately quite often we have no choice and people who knows that other people depend on them are the ones that suck the most.

p.s. you spelled "depending" wrong as "denpending" (in your first response) -- I'm no Freud so I'll leave that Freudian slip for you to decode.

Freudian theories don't apply to monkeys.

Oliver wrote:

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

Oliver wrote:

GenericTylerDurden wrote:

the lesson learned is: don't depend on people.

Unfortunately quite often we have no choice and people who knows that other people depend on them are the ones that suck the most.

p.s. you spelled "depending" wrong as "denpending" (in your first response) -- I'm no Freud so I'll leave that Freudian slip for you to decode.

Freudian theories don't apply to monkeys.

actually, monkeys are a very integral part to Freud's original theories

"Clinical psychologist Don Bannister has described Freud's position on the human personality as being:
"...basically a battlefield. He is a dark-cellar in which a well-bred spinster lady (the superego) and a sex-crazed monkey (the id) are forever engaged in mortal combat, the struggle being refereed by a rather nervous bank clerk (the ego)." "
http://changingminds.org/explanations/personality/freud_personality.htm