"INTJ Humour
Since I spent the time compiling this from the INTJ Forums on Facebook, let's share it with everyone!
You know your an INTJ when:
- You root for the smart villain rather than the dumb hero
- You have more books that you call friends than actual people
- Before every situation you think out every possible outcome and work your way towards the ideal one
- People think your angry or upset when really you are just thinking
- You can do the INTJ stare, that look of pure analyzing coupled with a slightly sardonic smile that makes people feel uneasy
- Nothing is ever done efficiently enough. Other peoples' incompetence slows you down through your day and it happens far too often.
- What do you mean you don't have a plan?
- You always forget if you locked your car because you always space out when you do it. You also forget where you parked your car for the same reason. You were too focused on what you were going to do next.
- You have a fairly organized room but you have little piles of crap in various corners and shelves. These are your ideas that you are still waiting to get around to. Some are in pieces, some are half made. You should really get around to giving your android army their appendages otherwise your plan to take over Washington D.C., London, Beijing, Moscow, and Tokyo will never work. They are getting impatient.
- You walk out of romance movies in disgust and laugh through horror flicks.
- You go onto a discussion board of like-minded people and don't agree with any of them.
- Someone says your smart and you reply "I know".
- You silently listen to people trying to figure out how to do something, then chime in with the correct way while they stare at you stunned because they didn't think you where paying attention.
- you look at every conflict situation as an interesting idea, and it pisses off the person you're in a conflict with (especially xxFx types hehe).
- someone tries to hurt you with words and you don't feel a thing, in fact, you kind of find it funny.
- you have 3-10 different conversations in your head with the person you're actually talking to
- you have your favourite type of agenda book
- you never leave your house without some kind of list
- you constantly get asked WHY and HOW do you think your life plan will work out, and have trouble explaining the amount of contingency plans you have built in
- A" life plan" is irrelevant because you know anything could happen that is out of your control and you have to stay flexible and work out various scenarios. There is no one answer.
- You have actually thought out ways in which you could escape a prison if you were ever locked up.
- You have serious plans for events such as tidal waves, zombie uprisings, nuclear war, etc...
- When you can better explain and understand things like time travel, alternate realities and fringe sciences that you can members of popular bands, reality tv shows or flirting
- You greet a person with, "I've been thinking about. . ."
- You constantly watch the way people do things and create more efficient ways of doing them.
- You upset people by telling them, "The way you're doing [thus and thus] is interesting, but you should do it [in this more efficient manner]."
- Assessing flaws in a security system is second nature to you.
- someone starts a sentence with "Why don't you..." and you turn and give them a very mean look.
- When you just finished explaining something profound and interesting and the person who are talking to goes "HUH?"
- When people say you always look like you are planning/plotting something; the association then often makes them conclude that you look evil.
- you’re listening to someone you quickly jump ahead to their point while multi-processing their motive for telling you, how they jumped to that topic, what level of response will be adequate (verbal, head nod, etc.), and planning whatever it is you rather be doing… all before they even finish their sentence.
- When everyone expects you to give a lengthy speech on a subject in class debate you are indifferent to and give said speech in five or six sentences and still trump the opposition.
- When people tell you "You know, your music is really really odd." whereupon you turn to them and say "Huh, interesting drum pattern here on track 10."
- You get called out in class for excessive daydreaming but still get top marks somehow to the annoyance of most present.
- When you really, honestly don't care what most other people think about you, and are perfectly fine doing things your own way.
- When you have a large mess but know exactly where everything is and people are amazed that you can find anything. You also go through cycles of neat-messy-neat-messy-neat.You are never rigidly neat, you are never overwhelmingly messy.
- You are fine without shopping for new clothes for a year or two.
- when in a debate your most commonly used phrase is "Could I get some proof for that?"
- when you can effectively argue both sides of a debate, you just pick one for fun.
- You refuse to read your annual performance review because a) you really don't care what other people said about out, b) anything you did wrong last year.. YOU ALREADY KNOW it.. and have probably played it out in your mind a 100+ times figuring out how to avoid that mistake again and trust your own solution over someone else's, c) you hate people wasting your time on stupid stuff from the past, d) you hate people wasting your time right now, and e) you don't need to be reminded of all the things you did right last year because you already know it.
- when you are having a conversation with someone and you use more adverbs such as "however, yet, on the other hand; more often than you should because that is the "break" between different view points about the subject being conversed. Then the recipient stares at you blankly.
Lastly...
....when somebody says "you're so smart" and you reply one of the following.
a) I know
b) Only compared to you
c) Coming from a moron like you, that doesn't mean much"
http://devoguy.livejournal.com/210800.html